He was finally here at Christmas' Eve 2008. And it was all coming back again. Only one class made more than a bliss of what dancing meant to be in this whole wild world.
It was like a atmost pleasure that rushed to me unstoppably, one after the other, and each time was more than what was before felt ultimate. The movements were all so smooth and charming and you would feel you were the most beautiful dancer on the floor.
I could never image how "euphorhia" was like if I had not met him. Every time, amazingly, when I felt I needed some "real" dances in my life, he appeared. And my world spinned.
After all he was gone, there were so many times that I felt I could dance right having the same level of adrenaline. But there was nothing ever compared, when he was at the front dancing.
Absorbed. Dispersed. Tensed. Exploded.
He brought only joy and left with sorrow and emptiness. Counting days again .... to his return.
............................ There was a new dance in town and I was so excited. My dear Prince Kimji was going to teach "Pole Dance"! Believe it or not! They offer free trial sessions and all the free classes were packed. I didn't have a chance to try. At Ekamai club launch, there was a show from Pole Dance World Champion! and she made my chin drop!
Wooooooooooahhhhh!
Don't hold your breath! It was nothing like when you go to Go Go bar in Patpong or Pattaya at all. It was very artistic and powerful of beautiful muscles. You needed a body of iron to do that.
Forget the part of erotic dance for a while, that needed to come later .... way later not sooner.
First, you need to have enough shoulder strength to hold yourself up to that slippery and shiny "pole". Remember that this was not a tree or even a coconut tree that had twigs or texture for you to hold on to. It was just a bare pole made of steel, fixed on the ceiling and secured on the floor.
I danced constantly for 2 years, not counting my dreams of dancing that would make it even longer. I assumed that I had got some strength and stamina to dance for many hours as the passion grew.
My first "pole dance" was not that easy.
I felt a little awkward that I had to wear shorts. But there was nothing to be shy anyway. My dance teacher was my dear and the others were my friends. What did I need to hide? My body fat, may be!
I was told to grab the pole to lift my body up in the air. Yeah... I did for a few seconds as my hands held the pole tight but sliding down like a rocket. Again, I was told to "walk around the pole" and swing around the pole as called "front hook".
As sweetest as can be, my Prince Kimji smiled at me giggling as he told me not to wear finger rings that made my grab to the pole not firm enough. How sweet! I knew I was not skilled. He knelled down on the floor beside "my pole" trying to help me swing my legs to tug the pole gracefully. I had to hold my breath because I was afraid I might kick him in the face as he was very close.
Bang!
My little Prince Kimji now on the floor on his butts laughing.
"You butt hit my face!", He screamed.
I still grabbed my pole as I went down on the floor too.
S..S...S...S...Sorry... but let me do that again please! ............................
Started off with “She bangs” and “Every time we touch” as called “warm-up” made me sweat from head to toes. I was already in trance.
“We’re going to learn hip-hop steps today!” He smiled and looked at us. Imagine half of the class was over forties, in which one third was in late fifties. Somebody started scratching head and made a chin-drop puzzled look.
“That would be amusing!” I thought and tried not to think too much of my clumsiness that might be unavoidably happening anyway. I was telling myself to stay in trance. I didn’t want to wake up. Please, Please…. Keep me there!
Some beautiful girly ladies made some disappointing howling-like voices behind me as we were familiar with cheeky bitchy steps. I was trying to tell myself it would not be too hard and everything would be fine.
He smiled, almost laughed, when he looked at many confused eyes in front of him.
N’Sync! Oh dear! The song titled “Pop” released many years ago when Justin Timberlake was in that Boy Band. The song was not really in “pop” genre to me.
Naturally, as he moved, we moved. He stopped and screamed! We stopped. Those jumps and jerks were challenging and not even a second turned me down. The music was played over and over and I danced hip-hop today!
I was taken back to 2001 with the dances to the song. If anyone could hear me scream tonight, it would be the scream out of the “Pop” of my popping crunchy heartbeat to the top!
Ricky Martin’s look stunned me when I first saw him sing “The Cup of Life” for FIFA World Cup hosted by France in 1998. His face was so structured and symmetric like Roman statue gloriously sculptured by Michael Angelo. And everything that was associated with him seemed fine. That was always the benefit of that kind of look. One of his hit singles, “She Bangs”, has come to the studio with energy-draining dance steps that would make anyone overwhelmingly soaking wet. Those body waves, jumps, Latin steps, and head turns made my sweat flowing from every pore to cover my eyes. And the spotlight turned lens-flared without the need of any camera filter. I couldn’t even count how many hips swings and turns I have made in the 7th heaven until the song faded. Again, Prince Kimji, he screamed and shouted to cheer his crews to dance as if the floor was on fire.
“She bangs, She bangs…”
Swing your hips to the front twice – Double jump to the right and to the left
“She moves, She moves…”
Swing your hips in turning half round to the right, body wave with right leg front and left leg front
“She looks like a flower but stings like a bee”
Box step and shoulders shaking
“Like every girl in history…”
Quick turn, Jump, Latin double steps, and turn!
I could not dance without him screaming and shouting.
“Kick floor change! Kick floor change!” I could hear him screamed over and over in my head. In my blanket, I kicked and kicked with my eyes tightly closed. No! I wasn’t dreaming.
Prince Kimji’s look was nothing similar to that of Ricky Martin.
I didn’t realize the meaning of Pon De Replay (Rihanna) until my beloved Kimji dance teacher began his moves. Cherry, again, with her artistic dance skill, had successfully made her moves on the 32-step first and taught me to move to the tune. It didn’t seem too difficult when practicing with the claps mimicking song rhythms without the music play. We did and he laughed. Sarcastically, when the song was on, the 32-step had to be repeated twice. Cherry counted her moves and so did I. Never once, we had made it to the beat. We only made it to the 16th step and we were gone, hearing Kimji dance teacher’s laugh like he was on drugs. Today was the last class for this song. I didn’t know I should thank him or I should have felt sorry for myself. We still didn’t make it more than the 16th step out of 32 steps or to be honest out of 64 steps when we had to make it two rounds. He screamed and laughed through his microphone making me insane. His laugh was going to haunt me in my dreams and so did Cherry’s moves. I really thought I was gone far more than craziness every time I laughed myself to sleep when I thought how clumsy and how funny it was in the dance class. And my adrenaline rose to its peak.
Tonight it was coming back again. After just an hour of dancing – the dancing of every cell – , the 32-step turned the magical 64-step dance without breathing that encircled myself from the whole world around me.
My dear Cherry, she thought that she might look cool with a green head band on the dance floor. I couldn’t really figure out what had made her think so but she seriously tried hard. That was the third hour of dance of Cherry on a rainy Tuesday night. We have come a long way and we have gone too far. We finally went to Pinklao Club after the dance at Club Sukhumvit 23. At the end of confusing dance steps on the first launch of “Every time we touch”, we made an attempt of a coin flip for making decision that we would go or no.We couldn’t find a coin and we use my OralB box to flip instead. There it went!We made our clumsy way and learnt the hard way going to Pinklao branch where it was 30 kilometers away from Sukhumvit Club. We got there late but we were perfectly “all right” as Christina Aguilera said in “Ain’t no other man”. Cherry put on her green head band and made her sexy dance post. Stunning!I couldn’t help myself laughing as I saw her fine flimsy hair forced upward by the green head band. She threw her head left and right as the dance steps took her to the top. Yes!Her fine hair couldn’t stay a place but even fussier. The green head band on a pale white face, no blush because of no blood, she was somewhere near fainting or dying I couldn’t tell.
Stop it, my dear, before I pee my pants!
Seriously enough, and again, Cherry was in my car. We were driving to Siam Paragon Club and it would be my third class of the day – just to dance Ain’t No Other Man! I was on the phone with a friend and the talk was quite serious so it took sometime. Cherry couldn’t stand being left alone as she pulled her iPod from her tote. I took a glance but my telephone conversation was not done yet. It was alright but I knew I should have hung up the phone because my Cherry was getting nervous. Why?Simple enough.She was going to dance!
I hung up the phone and looked at the front because I should as a driver. With my left eye, I saw her move.I had to turn my face to look at her. On her iPod, it showed “Ain’t no other man” media art and Cherry shook her right shoulder at the front and back.
“Tell your mother, your brother, your sister, and your friend. And the others, your lovers, better not be present tense. Cause I want everyone to know that you are mine and no one else's!
Ain’t No Other Man But Y…y….you!”
I didn’t realize that I began shaking my right shoulder too.
Melancholy candle lit in the middle of a darkest corner of the room. Silence paused and my thought continued to the far side of the ocean. It might be because of the endless virtual drum beats and bangles tinkled.
I missed you.
Every movement there was your shadow and every turn was inspired by your command. Duputta waved through the air for you as it lightly touched my face as if you touched me.You were my mind blowing mahiya.I thought of you wherever I went. I knew you were so far away and I missed so much more than I could describe. You would never know how it was like.
I danced every step as if you were watching me. I smiled at your reflection in the mirror. I smiled to myself when you didn’t know that I looked at you. I could see you there.Even when I closed my eyes I could see you move.I could see you when you were away.
I was away and I missed you. It would be like an aquarium.I could only look at you through a glass wall.I could love you infinitely like this.I would dance with you and leave the whole world behind.
A see-through "Duputta" in pink with silver stripes was made curly moves between my hands as my face looked as serious as it could be. The thin-as-air duputta was as heavy as an iron bar when it was moved swiftly for an hour in the hands of a new duputta twister. Mystical dance move began with walking forward with duputta on the nose and flipped to cover the face. Pretending that the face was mysterious enough, I wondered if my master didn't want to see our bare faces but covered with duputta which could make our faces looked much better.
Duputta's were elegantly floating in the air as Ojos Asa was playing. The mystical dance was not in our moves for now as it was in our heart trying to make it stand out to the crowd. I hoped that my master wouldn't give up to the way we were trying to dance.
It was 7:10 PM. I stood in the studio at Esplanade wondering why I was there in a crowd. This is the third dance in a row and I was so dead tried. I kept asking myself if I was insane.
The first dance was Namaste Ji and followed by Let’s get loud. It was enough and I had lots of work to do. Restless mind.I wanted to dance Dola Re Dola until the end of the song. There I was.
There were more than a hundred people in the studio and I had a hard time moving. I kicked to the right knowing that there was a guy beside me whom I may accidentally kick him on the face if I didn’t care enough. He survived.
The song was 6 minutes long and the dance was so cool.I could not stop even my body was screaming. I could feel my energy drained.My sweat was like water pouring from faucet.My eyes were blurred and limps were hurt from the bones. The devil in me laughed so hard and stretched out my torso to the edge.
The foremost was the move that I had to pull myself down to the floor and shook my shoulder then stood up again quickly to jump left and right. I thought it was my last shot.When the dance ended, I was so happy I could go home.
The odor of massage oil for muscular pain was not so nice. I had to sleep on electric warm blanket to relax my body. It was all pain and a blissful dream.
I couldn’t get enough and I didn’t know why. I wanted to be there again and again. Enough was not fulfilling and I dreamt of dancing again.
My stomach soared and my mind was unrest in the early morning. Tomorrow was the day that I had to be present to the committee for the research proposal. Work tickled my brain but I was very nervous. One side was telling me it was alright but the other was telling me I was insane. I could not rest a peace at all and I tried to search for meditative music to calm down. The meditative music was wiped out at the last iPod crash. I didn’t care to put them back. What for? Now I thought about listening to them but they were not there at all. Not even easy listening music. They didn’t interest me at any occasion. I looked at the clock many times in morning meeting. I didn’t care if anybody would notice. I set my time and I did my job. At 11 AM sharp, I drove off to the studio. My stomach roared again as if something was trying to pull me back. No way. I had a great battle to myself. I had to decide how many classes I should go. For sure, I was not going to skip all of them. I had to be there at least for a dance.
There I was in the studio at Esplanade. I stood there waiting eagerly for the song to play. It was not the song I expected to hear but it was not disappointing. And the dance was very much to my desire. It was not common to like it at the first class but I really did. It must be something extraordinary to this. I was overjoyed.
I had to break my thought and tried to get back to what I had to do. I couldn't help counting hours before the next dance. It was 75 hours to go. My heart would skip a beat for it.
Dance to it even if it was a doom day ahead and dance like there is no tomorrow.
In a pleasant surprise, I heard Dola Re Dola in the studio and I could feel my temperature rising. The first two bars of knee-up jerking and shoulder shaking with body leaning backward had inevitably made euphoria in me. Turning front with arms wide open and one knee up, followed by pushing hips to the right to the richness of Indian music was incomparable. This was what I really longed for. I searched for the old movie Devdas and played the dance scene over and over. Two beautiful girls in elegantly adorned sarees with half a hundred of dance crews danced in the hall in front of envious audiences longing to dance like them. It was a stolen moment of joy as I ran from basement from the regular studio to the first floor together with some of my friends. And my heart beat fast. I was daydreaming of dancers whose bangles tickled, eyes rolled, bodies moves spiritually like they would never stop dancing as I move mine to the tune. Love was in the rhymes and love was in the air. They clapped, tapped, jumped, and kneeled down. All my friends were gone but I was still there dancing among strangers. I looked at myself in the mirror smiling alone. Nobody else would understand this moment of truth. This was not the first time, nor the last. Knowing what my heart longed for, it was just a dance away to my dream. It was not possible to be anywhere else. I was not sure whether they were spotlights or my eyes glittered when I stared across the corner at the movement of charm. It was mind blowing, thus it was mesmerizing. I didn’t care what the time was.
One fine day, it became frustrating in the dance studio.The song I wanted to dance was ended sooner than expected because they would throw a party. Those remaining songs were not too bad but they seemed repeating of the same style in the mix of Western and Bollywood dances. I liked most of the dances after a few classes, not the first. Lately, the songs were not my taste; only one song entertained me and ended too soon in my absence. I didn’t like anything more than Indian dancing but I realized I was going nowhere.And my passion for dancing increased tremendously. Sometimes I wondered if I had made my time for something else. I rarely did.I was so in to Indian style and I got so high when I dance. I even dreamt of dancing.This time it reminded me of when Master Uday has gone to Hong Kong for good and I was completely lost. I felt there would be no way to regain my spirits without him teaching. After a while, I was relieved because my passion for dancing was never subsided. It was a challenge when I didn’t like the song very much but I tried.The only reason why it was like that because dancing was so divine. It was only frustration that annoyed me so much when I didn’t seem to fit in there like this time around.
I would never give up.I would be there again tomorrow and I would feel the spirits again in the chaos of my time. I would fight for a chance of being overwhelmed with joy when I dance. I would eagerly wait for the next dance and I would again in my full spirit, absolutely and whole-heartedly, “dance”.
It was another rush day that I had to do so many things but dance. It was pretty irritating when I had to do a lot of work in a very limited time without having a chance dancing. For my light head for a Friday like this, I wear my chestnut scheme color to kick start a day. After parking at the university fence, I started looking for matching shoes. And the devil began laughing.
My white polka dots on black shoes looked so funny on my today's dress both style and colors. My brown shoes were removed from my car many days ago when I had to drive across town with load of bags and thingy. The other options were not very good either. All I had in my car were dance shoes; 5-inch high glass-like heel stripper's shoes, flat flimsy black leather jazz shoes, pure white jazz shoes, and glittery Latin dance shoes!
What a day!
Dance shoes only meant for dancing. I don't wear dance shoes for other purposes if not necessary. Well it was only 4 hours away before I had to run home for changing my dress to wedding reception. I finally wore polka dots and really felt funny. At least my feet were comfortable and my dance shoes were saved for the dances.
All in a day’s dance, many choreographers seem to have alike minds. It may be one of their desires to make the dance better than others and the desire of showing how talent they are.I don’t go to many different dance masters because of many of my limitations of time, responsibility, and memory although it is a challenge and of course the fun part.To me, dancing is unlike others in sport; even some may not see any difference from dancing to aerobic exercises. I personally have definition for dancing as sacred movements of divinity that ones move from inner soul and spirits.One of my dear dancer friends said “When we see dance performance, it always a pleasure.But the feeling of the audiences is incomparable to those of the dancers.Dancers are the ones who have the most dazzling moment and inner joy.” I completely agreed with her.
Recently, I have two versions of “Step up II’s Low – Flo-Ri-Da” which one was from Master Nareen and the other was from Kru Pol.I love both of them but it seemed so confusing to memorize different versions of dance steps for the same song.Nothing is more enjoyable.The best part was the difference in creative dance styles of different variations.When the music played to the “chorus” at the verse “low..low..low..low”, in one version, it got to body wave from head to groin and reverse. The other was to quick jump to stand on two feet with hands rolled upward beside the ears and back to half sitting with hip swing back and front. They are all in only 4 counts or half a bar.
My legs hurt and my hip hardly move. It obviously shows whenever I walk, especially when I walk up or down the stairs. I think I cannot dance but when the music plays, all the pains are magically gone.The dances make the pains go away until the class ends. Removal of dead skin from both of my feet has become regular and the muscle pain seems to be close friend. Nothing is compared to dancing.The whole world is far apart and the world of my own is mesmerizing me.
Waiting and waiting for the mystical moment. I try to get myself to sleep and dream of those dances of divine.
As I massage my legs to relieve some pains until the next dance.
Yes! We had guests from India. And yes! They were from Hyderabad. And yes! They were veggies!And (another “and”!) they were mother and three clever daughters aged 13, 9, and 4. Don’t get me wrong. They were wonderful and no doubt about that.As we are professional dancers in our hearts, all we could do was holding our breaths and keeping the journey on. Raising children is a full-time job and we all understand that well even though none of us has children of our own. Believe me, we did our best.
The day began with meeting them at their apartment on Sukhumvit 22 road on Sunday morning.We were waiting on the ground floor but there was no sign of any of them. The meeting was misplaced as they were waiting for us elsewhere. That was alright we all had things to chit-chat all the time and only we knew the stories. Many people who accidentally heard any piece of our banter might think that we were insane but that was understandable. They were not wrong at any point.I sometimes think so too.
Erawan, The Three-Headed Elephant of god Siva
Kuntala at the shrine
Our first stop was “Three-headed Elephant” or “Erawan” monument which was god Siva’s elephant.It began raining but it was still okay so we strolled along to see what was inside.There was a big shrine and a temple.They had a chance to make some “Pooja” and put some flowers as offerings.I took some photos while they prayed.Kuntala asked me why I didn’t pray for their gods.I told her I was Christian and hope it was clearly understood and did not make any offense.
Lovely lotus in a bowl for "Hope Floats"
"Dao Reung" Flowers
There was a fusion-folk Thai dance group which was made up from little skinny girls and boys. Cherry and I looked at them and we were thinking how it would be like if we both went to India and lived lives of dancers at the shrine.
“I think our feet would be badly sore because we had to dance bare foot.” I started murmuring to Cherry.
Cherry nodded and looked at them dancing. She got carried away.
“I used to perform bamboo dancing too.” Cherry began to tell her story.“I also used to hit bamboo sticks too but I hit the dancers so they did not let me do that. They only had me dance.”
Bamboo dancing or “Lao-Kratob-Mai” is from Northeast of Thailand that dancers have to step over bamboo sticks in the harmony of song and rhythm. A person carries a long bamboo stick in each hand with another person carries the other ends. These two people have to hit the bamboo stick on a piece of wood at each end to the rhythm of music at the same time while dancers step across the bamboo sticks from one side to the other.
Imagine that! Scary Cherry hit those long bamboo sticks.I wouldn’t do bamboo dancing with her.
We went to crocodile farm and saw the scary show of all time “men fight with man-eating crocodiles”. Two young men were in a pond with more than ten crocodiles with bare hands and only wishful thoughts that those crocodiles were obedient to their commands. Cherry and I either closed our eyes or turned our faces away when they put their heads in between strong as iron jaws. How could you trust those teeth?
Ancient City
Kuchika's lovely post at Ancient City
The last place was my favorite “Ancient City” which was a place you can’t miss when you visit Thailand. It’s an area of 600 rais that mimics the map of Thailand. There are major Thai artifact copies from different parts.The place is well maintained and very educational.Hopefully the kids loved them.
Kumuda was only 4 years old and she was very tired from a long hot day trip. She began crying so we had very short time in AncientCity. The trip was well over before time.Cherry was tired too and I understood very well why. Three Indian children and a mother together with three Thai single girls and a Tolly dancer that made the day every unusual.God blessed us, we had P Goong who was very passionate with the kids and she enjoyed every moment with them. No matter how they cried, wanting to go to bathroom, hungry, or tired. P Goong could handle them.P Nuch, Cherry, and I did sigh a bit when we hear Kumuda screamed when she spilled hot coffee on her legs. And I was spilling my iced “Tao Tueng” on my jeans. Cherry was very helpful looking me laughing.
Do you want any description for this?
What can you do with baby crying and at the same time that a crazy adult giggling? Kill that peacock!
It was at the border line.I was bored and numb, having almost no feeling at all but wanting to go home.This was the third day in Singapore and I could see a place that was so structure, solid, and tiresome.I was on a taxi to Little India for the famous Muthu’s Curry.It started shiny when an office building caught my eyes.The windows made of woods were in seven harmonious colors, yet vivid.That stood out a day of extreme dullness.I could not wait for more as I took out my buddy camera from my baggy shoulder tote, rolled down the window and took several snaps.Good start!
At Muthu’s, food was clean and tasty.It was medium spicy but I guest you could tell them if you really wanted them as original.The Indian waiters were attentive as they were taking orders with handheld devices on wireless connection.
After having good food, I strolled on the riverside of the city and stunned by its charming lovely small Irish pubs along river bank.
Looking across the river, former Singapore General Post Office now luxury hotel, turned the city stylish.Just next to the Singapore General Post Office, there were skyscrapers but surprisingly they didn’t bother the elegant old style building.On the contrary, they enhanced the perspective and contrasted the clear blue sky in a hot sunny summer day.Even I personally don’t like skyscrapers but this is for sure the exceptional case.
Just a semi-sphere turn from the Singapore General Post Office, AsianCulturesMuseum was connected by a pedestrian bridge.It was one of many tourist attractions and anyone who had a chance to visit Singapore should not miss.They neatly organized history bits in different chambers where I could literally sink in for the whole day.
In a dull day, there were colors. And they were near me as I learned to cherish simple things around. I learned the way to breathe in every blessed moment and learned to be thankful to be able to dance again today and the days after.
I've come this far but rain is after me everywhere. I went from Causeway Bay and changed MTR at Admiral to Tsim Tsa Tsui. Then I got to MTR from Tsim Tsa Tsui to Jordan to visit Nathan road. It was so wet as it rained unstoppably. It was so dull and everybody here seemed to get used to it. Nothing was so active today. Street was not very crowded even when it was rush hour. I was so tired and weak it might be because of the rain shower and of course, the dance. My sneakers were damped and ugly and as soon as I got in my hotel room I couldn't wait to take them off.
And it happened to me that it was like something that has been annoying me recently. It stayed on my feet and I hardly took it away. Tomorrow will come and hope everything will not be too bad even if it will get worse. I have to keep my gloomy thought away from my sleep before I grind my teeth bleeding. There will be sun after rainy days. Cheers!
It’s a “meow” hot summer day making a moment sometimes quite lugubrious and lazy. A day can be most interesting when I know there is something new that I want to learn and yet not so difficult to get there although sometimes the heat of summer gets in the way. It’s really disturbing when I don’t know what to do first and even if I should do it today as late last night the street was so crowded and deemed insensible to go anywhere. Looking at the timetable again and again, still the decision is so hard to make when many things needs to be done in almost at the same time.I need to choose wisely.
First thing first!Reading books is not quite difficult but having eye sight problem and needing to adjust it make an easy thing too complicated. Focus seems too short to grasp anything out from pages and reading lasts too long to get what I really need. Browsing content on the Internet can easily lead me to wrong places as curiosity adds up by millions of entries found on search engines and I end up opening so many pages at the same time and get lost in space. “M…M…Meow!”
Aches and pains from yesterdays remind me of moves and steps in the rhythmic grooves, calling me to get out plus the heat through the right and left windows is trying to expel me away from here. Trembling and restless, I have to stick to priority and priority. My heart hungers for dancing but I have so many things to do. I start flipping pages I need to read and mark the pages I need to go through otherwise I will not allow myself to quench the thirst for dances.I finally keep my head down and keep reading.This is like a battle of soul.I know what I need to do against what my heart longs for. They need to coexist since I cannot survive one without the other. So control, control, and control.I rally through the miles and I need to see my gauge moves to the place I set to meet what is expected to set myself off.
Now the time is right.Let’s go dancing! …M…M…Meow!
The night is still at large and so does the dance spirit. It does get on me real tough and even tougher when things get rough. I only knew what dances of divine really meant when I first got my feet into the dance two years ago. And my world changed forever.
Bit by bit it got on me and crawled into my clump head.It began thinking about dancing all day whenever my mind got a peek.Until later I began imagine of the dances to my sleep with a smile on my face. In my dreams, I reflected myself dancing to the exotic tunes and moved to eternity, to the glittered lights, on the spotlights, under shining stars.My favorite pair of shoes has changed to a pair of plain soft black leather twined of tiny black cords with padded leather sole for dance practice.It’s called jazz shoes and it’s made to fit my feet. Never before, this time was real.It was not nothing near this high when I went to jazz dance class 15 years back.
It’s a mystic movement that has gone beyond my imaginary, yet became real and indispensable. What was “euphoria” I have never knew until the music has become another element and never before as tangier when I got to dance. My mind drifted away, away from the whole world, to the world of my own.
In my own space, in my sacred twilight and to my heart desire, like there is nothing in this world to bother me for heaven or earth, I want to dance and dance like there’s no tomorrow, ever again.
In Little India, Singapore, is definitely a place to cherish. On Monday afternoon where thousands of Indian are expected to stroll but when I went there, the charming Little India seemed so peaceful.
We went to Muthu's Curry and found it was rather full even late after lunch time. Familiar look of Southern Indian faces smiled at us to take orders. Only looking at the menu made my stomach groan and by looking at other tables was even more fancy. Yummmmmmmm! Bon Appetit!
Love has come to us in many forms and it has been always lavishly pleasing. It can happen at any place in any moment that you can never imagine. It brings tears in your eyes when the moment gets high.
Little smiles have never been so shiny where love started to bloom. It is blooming in our hearts and it never seems to end. Friends are people in my life who always shine brightly in those doom days where everybody else in the world has gone afar.I believe God sent them for a reason.The reason is love and the reason is infinity.
In this wee hour, I still think of my friends whose love is delivered from above.I thank God every time I feel their love that is so profound and cherishing. It must have been heaven. For all the reasons I might not be able to understand for the rest of my life, it does not matter now. A million words of thankfulness can never be enough.My friends have shown what it was meant by what has been written in the Holy Bible for thousands of year. This much is so true.
“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
Love never fails....And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.” - 1 Corinthians 13:4-13
“A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity”. - Proverbs 17:17
Where have you been for all my life until I found you?I love you my dear.
A hot summer day continued with restless heat. But flowers never stopped blooming as I wandered in a little Botanical Garden near my home. A small turtle at the top of half-sunk log splashed into the water suddenly when I approached to capture a post. Water bubbles traced the way the little turtle dove and faded.
Purple Feung Fah formed a splendid bouquet by the pond where the water reflected shiny emerald glow. The shadow of lively trees was clearly mirrored on the surface of slow moving tide that seemed solid and cannot be seen through further. What was underneath still a mystery and covered by the heavy rain last night.
An old big tree stood there for decades and spanned its branches to cover the ground. Deep green color shown the richness of life in full bloom where lovers hid under its shade from brave sunlight to cherish life.
A wee black and white bird flew swiftly over my car and stopped suddenly at the front shield to pick her wiry grass looking at me sharply as if I would grab it from her before she flew away quickly to a big tree of my neighbor. The other side of the small street, a kind of hooligan helped holding an old lady arm and walked her through a small grocery.
Small things in life can make a mere Wednesday afternoon special in a dash of this lonely planet earth. Isn't it a cherish of life we have here and shouldn't we caress it with respect and joy of our hearts as long as this world spins.
In the broad daylight, out of nowhere and without sign, rain sprayed all over and brought down the heat on earth instantly. It was really a blessing what Bangkok was to give. Whenever it came to the peak of hotness, rain came and frequently with thunderstorm. We got both water and winds and the movement on the surface ground cooled down temperature naturally.
I hope there are some similar places like Bangkok whose weather is lovely all through the year. The hottest month does not seem to be too cruel. As the rain comes, plants are fresh and come to life. Smell of the earth and freshness of the air can be found in the heart of the city. Natural disaster? Once in hundreds of year. Floods in Bangkok were regarded as disaster in 1982 because at that time the drain system was so poor together with heavy rainfalls. Even at the worst, zero death toll. I could hear the birds sang after the rain and danced on the green grasses. Blessed city, indeed!.
I remember my family and I had to travel by hitch-hiking which was very unusual in Thailand. We got on a truck from our house in Bangkapi just to bring food to our grandparents in Sukhumvit 71 (Klongton). We walked from the main street to grandparent's house and the water level was about my waist (I am not tall at all - way below standard Asian size!). It was fun and lovely when we finally got there. A few days later my grandparents moved to my uncle's house where it was dry. A few weeks later, we got back to grandparent's empty house (because no one was left there alone of course!) and found that the ground floor was flooded at half the height to the ceiling and we had to renovate the house. I still remember the fixed furniture made from woods and wood products were misshaped and became greenish.
This is not a remembrance of only the worst flood in Bangkok. Essentially, it's a memorial of love we had for each other in our family. Grandpa and grandma are now in heavenly hands. I really long for seeing them once again in heaven as I am still in this physical world. It has been more than 20 years since they were gone, but love has never faded away. Even now nothing remains the same and it never will. It feels like there is always something missing in life. Not being able to feel their caring and loving arms around me again but remembering their smiling faces with mercy eyes when they looked at me, there's warmth in the heart even it's a sheer distance apart.
I tried to persuade my mum to practice yoga many times but she didn't feel comfortable going in town. I think it might be because it has not come to the point that she liked it and still did not see the instant benefit.
For myself, the benefit was quite fast because I have been suffering from muscle pain at my right side of my neck and right shoulder. It was a symptom of lengthy and continuously computer mouse clicking. I had a chance today to go to a yoga class for 1 hour and a half. And the pain just went away. Regular yoga helps me a lot to build muscles, to burn extra calories, and keeping me fit. At the first place, it was torturing because my nature being too active to move slowly. I found this place suitable for me since the rhythmic yoga keeps me awake and alert. I have been to physical therapy session but it didn't help much. Once the session was over, the pain was back there as if it was hidden somewhere while treating. Unlike yoga, the pain went away within 10 minutes of practicing and won't come back again until a few days after. If I practice regular yoga, the pain is gone and my health is back.
I persuade everyone to practice yoga, it's an ancient art that is still active today and can help you at any age. It doesn't hurt your knees because most of the poses are non-impact. It helps stretching your muscles and move joints where they have rarely moved. It also helps your mind to focus better.
Stay healthy and active because we all have a lot left undone!
The day was so rush and I didn't even have a chance to pick up calls. Even breakfast and lunch seemed too long to take. I wished the day would end soon and I could take a break. I was waiting for my adviser to come to his office and I kept looking at my progress note to correct as many as I could. It took a while before I decided to go to a convenience store nearby as if there was a small window of time to let me know something new in life. As I turned at the corner of the building, my professor, whom I didn't get a chance to meet her in the last six months at least, drove her car pass by. She rolled down the window to talk to me as she broke the news. Good thing happens when it is least expected. When there's no sign at all.
My professor and adviser offered me a job. My adviser is getting married. The tensed day was over. I really don't know what I have done to deserve it. It appears as it may. I know there's always someone up there to watch over me and keep me in piece in times of need. Keep believing! PS. I intentionally inserted my favorite VDO here from Youtube that describes the feeling of a good day. "Feeling So Good" by Jennifer Lopez.
"A story beautifully told from the era of King Narai" accordingly to "you-know-who", he handed me a book so I started reading it while having reflexology. The first 13 pages were about action scenes of Falcon with a Malay. I really don't care much about reading such literature but I love exploring. Most of all, it's something about our "Siam", our "Motherland", our "Homeland", our "Thailand".
The book was appreciated by many publishers, as well as "you-know-who" who was so into the world history and many more. It happened that the details of the story seemed so real and he thought they were true. Well, I guess he has never seen our "Suriyothai" story. MR.Kukrit Pramoj had beautifully written a short novel on her and it was very impressive, quite amusing indeed. Who knows what had happened long ago. It may have a possibility of happening as one could make a wild guess.
My lovely Tuay Foo had lived a life with us for 17 years and 5 months. From the first day she was born, she was the prettiest puppy in my eyes. Her white puffy fur and sleeping eyes took my heart. She loved eating spicy food and fried rice. Her favorite sweet was "Tuay Foo" just as her name but it had to "S&P". I remembered holding her in my arms to sleep. Her soft fur lightly touched my face as she lied down on her back. Now she's in heaven leaving her body underneath the tree in my front yard. It's been 4 years now and I still miss her very much. I hope God allows dogs in heaven, especially my Tuay Foo. I miss her dearly.
A Moment before dawn always has me think of something special and is always a special and mystic moment. I can hear very small things tweak and breeze blows. I realize how beautiful my day was and here's a glimpse before the next peep of light.
Work Like you don't need money, Love like you've never been hurt before, and Dance like nobody's watching
My research continued with fear and hope. Downloading many published papers on my hard drives did help in a way. However, confused and worried mind like myself remained scared and questioned.
My research topic is vibrant in current argument with lots of grants all over. As defined by "framework", it has lots to do leading to many mixing paths. It's getting dark again and another day is passing over. What I got today are
- Friends support - Love from my mum (as always) - Curiosity level increase - More papers on my hard drives - Progress on my research (very little) and documented it in PowerPoint and Notes - More blogging - Confused ....
Yes! Late breakfast and early lunch could be called brunch if we put them together. Not my case. I had late breakfast with mum before she went off to see her doctor and then she rushed back home to cook me lunch.
Mother's love is like water. It never ends. Even though I don't like her idea of over-caring me for food, there is no point arguing. Love what she does as time flies to eternity. There will be no other love like this.
I was about to start my research. The phone rang again and my overnight burning candle was pouring its tears on the floor.! My dearest friend, Florence, ID shown on my cell phone screen. I wouldn't think twice.
An old friend is so valuable than gold. The more I am in the chaos, the more I can see. An old friend's laughter worths a day of heaven and a million memories to laugh after. I love you Florence.
A home recipe "mocca" is easily made and tastes great too. Simply add Malt Ovaltine or Cacao power in your Latte. You're set.
Even better with Hershey's Chocolate Syrups because coffee houses use it too. Whipped cream is an option.
My morning coffee is just a cup of Nescafe Gold, Cacao Power, and Creamer. I stopped using artificial sweetener, drinking diet drinks for a few months after I came to know the confirmation of such substances. Life's been lacking sweet tastes and it will take a while. My mum uses honey and you have to put it quite a lot to taste it in strong drinks like coffee. Good morning and Happy Monday!
I have changed my strategy. First, it was about "Back to Nature" and "Cherish The East". We belong to the East of the world and should not look for more westernization than we have today. It is already more than enough.
Beauty Tips - Change to natural or herbal products such as shampoo, scrubs, soap - Hair Coloring - I found Henna Herbs from India very appealing and giving great result but you need to admit that you will have jet-black hair rather than fashionable golden brown or auburn. - Local fruits - Thai Fruits are available all year round and taste terrific. Imported fruits are relatively expensive except ones from China. - Clothes - I tried local made ones and they are terrific. Thai Silk is expensive and difficult to handle but there is a trade-off of its stunning beauty. Alternative is handwork from India but it does not last long. - Beauty parlor - Try a salon near your home rather than international brand salon. It works too and much cheaper. Great result.
This Sunday evening seems so dull. It was raining lightly but it was enough to get on my car that was washed and polished yesterday. A gray sky looks so miserable but the beautiful pink Feung Fah are so lovely as everyday.
I always keep myself full in an easy way. It is not because I don't care much about food or I don't like going to kitchen but my interest is elsewhere. To keep me full and stuffed with protein. This is my dinner:-
2 cups of steamed peanuts 1 cup of rice soup with salty egg 1 cup of noodle
Now I can work late for tonight for my research and my work. Have to put my phone on silence too.
